my Gesu speech (behind that smile)

disclaimer- this is the unedited draft of my speech (part 2) at the Gesu, apologies for any grammatical errors. 

Before the season started I was able to talk to sir ricky palou after a game against a Japanese team that was visiting; and it was held In the hall of fame room in moro. he asked me ilang tao na ako sa ateneo. And I realized that im here for 17 years already so I asked sir ricky since we were in the hall of fame room already how to be a hall of fame. So sir ricky explained 20 years after pa pwede ma nominate and may point system raw number of championships one blah blah. So it came to my mind and asked him this. Sir ricky sino na ba pinaka maraming championship sa history ng ateneo since gradeschool? last Monday I asked the same question to jai. Maybe jai could answer that question.

For the first time in my life I wanna say I wanna go back to gradeschool and study all over again. Because here life is so much easier. Hell week isn’t really hell compared to the challenges of the life after ateneo. Here I can say that most of the students are spoiled and spoon-fed. That’s what im afraid of right now and that’s why now I want to say I just wanna study again because I don’t know what lies ahead. And I don’t want this feeling to end!

For the past years basketball has been a roller coaster ride for me. but First I wanna thank all my coaches here in ateneo from my first ever gradeschool coach tito len and coach jay to coach jamike in highschool and coach norman. To coach jamike thank you very much because kung wala si coach jamike baka di na ako umabot ng seniors! I learned a lot from coach jamike as a player but more than that as a person. He taught me how to lead a team how to fight for a team and how to be a good captain ball but what I learned so much about coach jamike is kung pano makisalamuha sa tao. But what I miss most is when coach jamike screams at my face! When coach jamike says: ”UWEEE!!! UWEEEE!!” and his favorite line ! “sinimulan mo! Sinimulan mo!” and when coach jamike kills you with his stare! playing in highschool was so fun that you really didn’t have to think a lot just basketball school and food! Haha!

College was a different story… it started in vegas my roommates were ford and then chris and I learned a lot from them. they were the captain balls of that season. my very first season I got injured right before the very first ateneo lasalle! Missed almost the whole season. And we lsot to lasalle in the semis. It was painful and we definitely learned a lot from that season! The transition In terms of the system wasn’t really hard form hs to college. The hardest thing in college is the pressure you get from all the people. I know for some I am a disappointment a lot didn’t appreciate how I played because I can’t score 20 points, because I can’t do what I did in highschool. It’s hard when you here those bad things about your self. Some of it personal some of it just plain BS. That’s why I deleted my formspring account and deactivated my facebook during the season. Yes I am very emotional and it affected me the very first time I heard stuff like those. I wont name names anymore but there was a time a very known personality In school told me after I played a very decent game “ohhh bacon.. you’re not useless today!” I’ve been studying here for 17 years and I know to read between the lines and I also know what he means by that. He just told me in front of my face that I was useless in a nicer way. Sometimes I wonder am I the villain of the team? Kailan ako naging kontrabida? But every superhero needs a villain or else he wont be a super hero.

Going to this final season I accepted the role to be a leader on and off the court. To accept the role that not everyone would accept. Sometimes I would tell myself why don’t I take 10 shots a game like some of my teammates? This should be my year my breakout year! And yes maybe I didn’t really “breakout” this year? But I can tell everyone right here with all the honesty of my heart that I did what I was supposed to do. I did what coach asked me too. And he didn’t asked me to score 20 points a game he didn’t ask me to take 10 shots a game. He asked me to lead this team to play defense and to be the glue and the extension of the coaching staff to my teammates. And yes maybe I have a lot of haters out there I know it people still tweet me, yes maybe there are more haters than people who believes in me. Because not everyone who sings the alma mater and shout one big fight will help you win that championship. They want to win and they have a good intention but the execution of  how they support isn’t just right but I still thank them for supporting the team.  But I know, that I won the hearts, the trust and the love of the people who are important, the inner circle that the team built. Most of my teammates know this that every day I pass by the chapel, in the college chapel or the one in moro. In my prayer I always thank God for what I have for all the blessings he gave me. All the wins e gave, Then every before game I say “Lord guide me in the game sana maka atleast 10 points ako sa game okay na ako.” Yes I pray for that. But before I end every prayer ill contradict what I just said cause I always say “ lord kahit di na ako makshoot basta magchampion nalang”. I always pray this when I visit the chapel cause I know it hurts when you graduate and not winning the championship. Hindi lang ikaw masasaktan pero lahat ng kasama mo sa team at  buong ateneo.  But what hurts more is when you see those kids watching in the stands crying because you lost a game. I remembered what doc said when his son, ben, cried after losing the game against adamson. And that’s just a game not even a championship game. I think jai said it in his speech before that those kids are an inspiration. And they really are. They don’t deserve those tears that’s why for me personally I don’t wanna lose.

Lastly, let me explain why I changed my number since a lot were asking, first because nico was bugging me about this number for 3 years now. And i didn’t really want to give it because I am a superstitious person. Sabi  ko baka malasin pa tayo. But I finally said okay because walang number 13 this year and number 13 was my original number back in gradeschool, I want to end in how I started it. and 1 plus 3 = 4. And when I said that I was gonna get the number 13 tita Debbie was like are you sure?! and her voice kinda raised a little higher. Tita Debbie told me that it might spark up big issues. And on cue when the season started heard and saw a lot of stuff that said the fake 13. And yes im the fake 13 cause the real on is my dad. That’s why I chose the number 13 In the first place because I dedicated this season to him. And that’s the hardest thing also dedicating something to someone. and you dedicate it by playing against him, by trying to defeat him. My dad is the reason why I am in ateneo. If he didn’t enroll me here in prep I wouldn’t be here right now. And I remembered summer before my first year in college coach norman and boss pao told my dad and I in a meeting in sweet I that im not yet sure in the lineup. It’s still a tryouts but for sure they will give me a scholarship. So my dad talked to me and told me “ sa ateneo ka na. Pag di ka makuha team b ka muna. Tapos magpakundisyon. Pero importante makagraduate ka. May scholarship ka na” And I know that was dad’s dream to graduate cause that’s the one thing he wasn’t able to do, to get a college diploma, but I am so thankful for what he did for me and my family. And yes he did the right decision for making me go here.

People say that I might have been a better player a star player if I went elsewhere. But I know that I made the right decision cause I had a great coaching staff, management, teammates  great people around me, and a great school. A couple of sbp championships and some minor league championships in gradeschool. 2 uaap championships in highschool and a couple of minor leagues in higschool,  fr martins championships, pccl championships and a couple of invitational league championships, and finally 4 uaap championships in college and on top of that an ateneo education and diploma to back it up! Saan ka pa???

Thank you everyone and Goodnight!!! see you at the bonfire!